You Don’t Deserve to be A School Counselor

Dear Mr. X,

I debated for a long time whether or not I should include your real name. Of course my first thought was that I don’t care at all if people know who you are or what you did. People should know who you are because of what you did. But then I thought, that’s something you would do, and you’re one of the last people I would ever want to be like. So I am took the high road.

I am writing to you, my elementary school’s counselor, to tell you about the time you were terribly wrong. So wrong in fact, that not only did you crush the self-esteem of a 11 year old boy but the exact opposite of what you told him happened. So I must admit, this letter is more than just an explanation of what a real school counselor should look like, it’s kind of an opportunity to rub it in your face. You see, I know several school counselors and aspiring school counselors who are amazing people. And they deserve that title, they earned it. You sir come no where close to deserving it, and honestly you ruined school counselors for me and my family until I graduated high school.

Let me back up. It was 2008, the end of my little brothers 5th grade year. You wanted to meet with my parents to discuss my brothers academics and if he was ready to move on to middle school. You made it very clear you didn’t think he was ready (although last time I checked the teacher would have a better idea about this than you, and she seemed to think he was fine). Then you said something that still sticks with my brother to this very day. He was sitting right there, when you look at my parents and said “Honestly, he won’t make it very far. He definitely won’t go to college and I doubt he’ll graduate high school. He’s just not smart.” First of all, he was in 5th grade. How in the world did you base that statement off a student who has only just completed 5th grade. Second, I don’t care how badly a child is struggling, it is your job to help him reach his full potential and understand how much of it he has. Third, he was sitting right there.

Ever since that day, I have never heard my little brother say anything positive about his intellect. In fact, his anxiety worsened and the only things he ever said were “I can’t do it” “I give up” “I’m not smart enough” “I’m way too dumb for this.” You took a little boy who simply need guidance and turned him into someone who doubted himself completely. Well guess what. That little boy did graduate high school. That little boy is 20 years old, on track to graduate from a four year university a semester early and already has an internship lined up. That little boy, is twice that man you will ever be. Not only did he do the exact opposite of what you said he would, he grew up to be funny, loving, protective and determined. All the things I thought you had once killed inside of him.

I came across this article, and I thought it was kind of funny. Most people will just see it as a  an article about school counselors, but I found it funny because having a counselor that actually did his job seemed like a joke.

“Elementary school counselors…

  • Help students with organizational and learning skills
  • Help students better understand themselves
  • Help students with peer relationships
  • Help students learn and utilize coping strategies
  • Help students communicate with their teachers and peers
  • Help students who may need other services put in place
  • Help students and their families who may need extra support
  • Help students by being an advocate within the school system
  • And more…”

This is hilarious because I don’t think you knew how to do one thing on this list. And the best part of all this, before my brother and I reached high school, you had gotten a job at our high school. Oh yay. As I was hoping you had just had an off day, or something terrible happened to you that day and you were actually a decent human, man was I wrong. Not only did you bring your negative attitude, you turned into the guy who fixated on sending girls home for their outfits. You made it your mission to walk around the cafeteria and humiliate girls for violating the dress code that was quite frankly ridiculous. You not only told students they would amount to nothing, you deprived any chance they had at getting a good education by sending them home because their shoulders were showing, or because you could see 1/4th of an inch of their thigh. I have one thing to say about that, stop looking at our bodies and start learning how to do your job.

Part of me wants to say sorry if any of this is too harsh, or offensive. But then most of me reminds myself that you did way worse to an 11 year old with a learning disability. So therefore I am not sorry. You sir do not deserve to be a school counselor.

Sincerely,

A proud older sister

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